We have guests! In the three or two years of doing this blog I never knew I would be talking with real Hollywood celebrities! I am wholeheartedly honored.
Tonight is full of wonderful guests such as:
And last but not least
But first we have to get some 'not as anger inducing' current affairs out of the way.
LUCAS HOME REALTY
I’ve been hearing news about George Lucas (The Entrepreneur who also made Star Wars) with an idea of making low income housing on a chunk of his land. Problem is snooty rich neighbors oppose the idea. Okay, leaving out the neighbors, how would a Lucas owned housing community work? Would people move in judging by their monthly salary & set up a price? There’s a place down south where from where I live called ‘Harbor Village’ which does this & it’s not that bad (Or so I’m saying as someone who doesn’t live there), but it’s in the real ghetto part of town & I’m irked that it’s called a ‘Village’ because I see no blacksmiths or elves. Goddamnit! I WANT ELVES! Villages have elves, haven’t any of you played ’Elder Scrolls?’
Another thing that I have to question is, is Lucas going to renovate the place every 2 years & call it a ‘Special Edition’? Will the homesteads be shaped like the Tatooine homesteads from ‘A New Hope’? If so, then I hope to almighty that there’s a cantina band. This is all up in the air, or maybe Lucas isn’t going to make affordable housing near his ranch. I don’t know, rich people be crazy, especially Lucas. Whether you love or hate all of his movies, you got to admit this is not a bad idea, assuming he doesn’t enslave the people who choose to live in his homes. Still, at least he’s not thinking about himself when talking about making affordable homes, he’s set for life so he’s got the cash. We’ll see what happens later on.
WATER DROUGHT 2015
Hey guys, guess what, Arrowhead & Aquafina have been caught red handed with an expired permit to ‘Fuck’ water from California. Yeheah, they’re going to get FRACKED in the ass!!! Legally & financially of course, assuming if we all do our part & sign petitions & make phone calls & such. What’s sickening about it is their permit expired in 1988. Two & a half decades of these guys fucking mother earth & gaining millions in the water bottling industry. They couldn’t pay to get a new one? I’m not on the side of these corps drilling water out of the earth, but you would think a measly little permit could be paid for in a matter of seconds. Just goes to show you how lazy these corporations are. Oh mooohoohoo, hard work pays off! Unless you’re rich, old & a baby boomer, then who gives a fuck about hard work. I’m glad that this was spotted before any more real damage happens & I hope these corps go to court over this.
Now on the other side of things, Jerry Brown has issued ‘Water Surveillance’ & (this just sounds absurd) ‘Water Police’ to make sure everyone is saving water or fining people who are using a little too much water. Oh yes, the key sign of oppression, making sure everyone’s a ‘Good little sheep!’ It’s already happening in Long Beach CA, everyone needs to keep an eye on this. It’s clear as glass, the government wants to privatize water & next they’ll want to privatize the air. It’s already happening in Detroit, the governor shut off all the water on the state & at that same time frame the city wants to build the longest waterslide in the country. They’re going to charge $15 per person & it’s only going to be in the rich part of town, hahahah THE AMERICAN DREAM! While the lower poorer classes are having to deal with closed schools, a crumbling economy & crime probably going to mid 80’s Compton standards, we got a fucking water slide for all them Richie rich types. Anyone see the messed up nature of this kind of thinking?! Robocop, based on true events, except there are no robot cops out in the streets. Oh wait, yeah there are, but the real life cops are a metaphor of robots with no emotion. Was I deep or what?
Overall, we can win the fight if we just stop being oblivious to the truth.
Anyway, in this installment we got a story to tell, a real time story. STORYTIME!
So this week I was busy with a lot of things, writing the outline for ‘Welcome To The Dissidents’, doing a rushed episode of ‘Adventures in Pancakes’ & posting the premiere episode of ‘The Feind House’ which I can’t recommend any highly. Then out of nowhere I get an Email message from some woman named ‘Stacy Banks’. I swear to you, I was hoping it was going to be a bitchfit rant from some bored housewife or religious old person yelling about how I talked about religion on my previous Blogababble entry. I kid you not, I was hoping for that so I can feel achievement & get confirmation that someone besides my online friends are reading. Instead I get an ‘Offer’ from this Stacy lady saying I can earn 10k from blogging!
Anyways, the only time people can get paid to write online is if you let advertisers paste their banners all around the page like some kinda Mexican photoshop banner. No sale!
What I love about the homepage are the ‘Customer Quotes’ on this thing, let’s take a look at them. I’m a huge sucker for laughing at stock photos of people, they’re easy to make fun of.
Oh, & she’s a Food Blogger, they’re as useful as a radio DJ’s that asks the audience to ‘See this’ without explaining anything.
‘Better than Google AdSense.’ this guy says. I wouldn’t know, because I’m not an idiot.
Okay, that’s enough of harping on stock photos of depressed people, let’s continue talking about this supposed ‘Company’. So this Buzzstarter company wants ‘Blogababble’ to be part of their little scam. Well, just to make sure this was a scam, I copied the address on the message & posted it on Google Maps.
So of course I googled ‘Buzzstarter’ on google & found the real ‘Buzzstarter’, their page looks actually better & straight to the point.
All in all, Buzzstarter will not get ‘Blacktime E-Press’, we’re the Anti-SCRAWL of the internet, we don’t talk about whiny bullcrap on Blogababble & if you submit anything to me (a mini-series or story, etc.), I will treat your work with respect, we’re creator friendly & all for the 1st amendment, unless it endorses Nazism or anything retarded.
To make sure this scam was actually a scam & not just some co-worker trying to ride up the corporate ladder, I sent them a well written, eloquently spoken letter to the fine folks at the ‘REAL’ Buzzstarter.
So thus ends my tale of Scammers & scammerees. Roll a D20, have a pint & tell Stacy Cucumber to go to hell. You aren’t a Nigerian prince Stacy, we know all your secrets!!! You got my hopes up, thinking it was an easily offended deformity from Oklahoma, but turns out it was nothing but a scamming scammer.
After these messages, after these messages, after theeeese messages! ………..WE’LL BE RIIIIGHT BACK!
Recently I haven’t been watching anything new, that ‘I-Zombie’ doesn’t really interest me, nor does the comic book.
Constantine is in limbo on whether it would continue with a second season or move to the ‘SyFy’ (Syphilis) Channel or just be done with TV altogether.
I believe I already said that if this upcoming season of ‘Hannibal’ doesn’t impress, then I’m done with that show because the last season was just an uneven mix of brilliant ideas with bad executions. All it took was for the victims to say “Hannibal was a good guy.” for him to get away with his crimes, even though the evidence wasn’t in his favor. So the fate of the show’s judgement will be sealed this June.
I haven’t been keeping up with ‘YuGiOh: Season 0’ for a while, mainly because it’s easy to get burned out with the show. I have to get through 12 episodes & a TV movie to see how it all ends. Every episode is the same, no continuity (Except the ever growing lust of Tea for Yami Yugi, which is just Yugi looking less like a weeaboo punkass) & every episode ends with the good Yugi winning so the shock is non-existent, just like every other Shonen based anime. A game of death! Yet no one dies; I would actually dig it if Yugi killed someone. Regular gay Yugi makes Cailou look like a death metal god & you are useless if Cailou surpasses you!
Thus brings me to the next topic, a bit of old news here so I may be just repeating what so many people have said. A group of ‘Concerned’ parents want the kids show ‘Cailou’ off the air.
“I can tolerate most kids shows, but cailou is unbearable. There’s no plot and the animation is avg. Can’t take it.”
-Arian Foster’s Twitter, March 25, 2014-
When I first spotted this article on TUMBLR, I could not help but laugh & just think it was an ‘Onion’ article. Nope, Arian is dread fucking serious about Cailou. I understand as an adult watching this now & seeing how Cailou’s presence & his constant crying can leave a horrid taste in your mouth. Understand this, Cailou is a 5 year old kid who doesn’t know his right from wrong. Here’s some weird history here, in Canada (& possiblly France) the show began in 1997 as a 5 minute short, instead of being paired up with other episodes like the American version. Also Cailou was part of a series of French kid’s book in 1989. The show was later picked up by PBS in Septemebr 4th, 2000 & each episode was paired with a handful of the 5 minute episodes, spliced in with new footage of cailiou’s stuffed toys as puppets to full in the 26 minute time slot of American television.
Ladies & Gentlement, you just read a 21 year old guy go into an intricate history about a cartoon targeted to toddlers, feel better about your own life?
Okay, back to Arian & his anger things about a cartoon. So the article I read is from SBN.com in which the writer, Spencer Hall, is egging him on about the how he too agrees with Foster’s stance on the bald French-Canadian cartoon character. To quote Spencer:
“If you are not familiar, you are a lucky person: Caillou is a despicable, spineless 4-year-old boy who cannot do anything. He can't grow hair, not because he has cancer or progeria, but because he sucks, and even his own body recognizes that he does not deserve hair or food or love. He has a baby sister who dominates his life because she is a normal, loving child who does not whine about the slightest fart of the breeze. Caillou's parents love her better because she is a better person.”
I’m laughing my ass off! Noted, I do (for some weird reason) like to watch the original episodes for nostalgia’s sake, but I both agree & disagree with him. I’m sure all of us as younger kids threw tantrums, if you didn’t then you were mom & pop’s godsend & that‘s why they never settled for another child. As for all of us normies, we threw tantrums as toddlers or cried for useless reasons. We look back at our lives & tell ourselves “Thank god we’re not like that now.” Cailou is a reflection of 5 or 4 year olds. I can see how Cailou can be a bad influence to the impressionable, that’s why parents should be the censor of the household, rather than censoring for the country. I’ve seen the recent episodes & minding the crap ass Flash animation, Cailou has steered far away from the bitchy kid he used to be & now he’s a productive thinker. He doesn’t whine as much as he used to in those earlier episodes, but it’s still that same educational show for the kids.
Overall, I’m not gonna harp on Arian Foster or Spencer Hall because this article gave me a good laugh, along with some good points on how Cailou is a useless character. Sure, we may have a difference of opinion on Cailou, mainly because I saw this show when I was 7 & Foster probably discovered it at a cynical age. I can watch the old episodes & enjoy them in both a nostalgic & a “They’re so bad, it’s good.” type of mentality. If your kid acts like a whiny little bitch after watching Cailou, then you have every right as a parent to keep them from watching it. Cancellation won’t harm me, mainly because the DVD’s are out there for the taking & YouTube has all the episodes up so my nostalgia is covered.
This has been Jebus talking about a show for toddler’s. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I need to get a life!
If you want to read this funny ass article, here’s the link:
It’s a hoot.
This week wasn’t that harsh, right? Sure I spilled some curse words here & there, but at least I wasn’t a demon. We got some good news out of the way, assuming if George Lucas doesn’t make a ‘Special Edition’ every three years on those homes he’s been wanting to build. I know they’re a corporation, but I hope Nestle gets anally pounded, Legally of course. Oh & wasn’t that scammer story funny? Well, funny in the way I wrote it?
Oh crap! I totally forgot about our celebrity guests!
Oh well, we have no time to talk to them now.
READ, COMMENT or COMPLAIN! I’d love some constructive criticism or if you hate Cailou, give me a hilarious response on why you hate the little bugger? I’ll probably end up agreeing with you.
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I might do a ‘not so harsh’ entry again, assuming if it’s a slow news day. When there’s not as much bad stuff happening, I like to have fun. So pray to whatever inexistent being you worship that this coming entry won’t be as anger filled.