Welcome back to another useless entry of Blogababble where the topics swing around & hit people in the face. I kid you not, I got mail from a reader who complained that we don’t talk about ‘Kanye’. Bitch, shut your mouth, get your head out of your media based ass & look at the real world. You think a celebrity breakup is terrible, wait till you see who wants to fuck the earth. Literally, this keystone pipeline is nothing but a steel penis & it wants to fuck earth & instead of injecting white flem, it wants to deplete the earth of it’s resources! ‘Fracking’, nope, it’s fucking. I haven’t talked enough current affairs this week, let’s do so now.
-Just a quick update here, I’m hearing a lot about the Net Neutrality thing here. I’m hearing two sides saying that we won Net Neutrality, but then I’m hearing the FCC is now in charge of censorship for the internet. Holy FUCKING SHITFACED ANUSBEAD BALLSUCKLING ASSHOLERY FUCKFEST COCKSUCKING (I’m running out of curses to throw at this) FART SIMPSON BANANARAMMING UP THE BUTT BULLSHIT is the true story? I hope all this FCC internet thing is nothing but a internet lie. People can go on the internet & tell lies, why do you think this page exists? OOOOH!!! I BURNED MYSELF!! But seriously, we need to keep our eyes fucking peeled, if the FCC decides to make internet censorship a law where nobody can say what they like or what they feel, we’re out of business & your entertainment will be nothing but a cheap cesspool of crap not even your grandparents would find entertaining. Keep an eye out for censorship claymores my troops.
-So He Stabbed Himself, Cut Himself Into a Ton of Pieces & Put Himself in a Bag.
I got this news off of ‘Hart Attack’, yes that Hart Attack. Want to hear someone who’s way more angry than me? Hart Fisher talking politics, make sure you have a diaper on when listening. So, this has been happening for a year; bankers working for major banks are being ‘killed off’ & ruled as ‘Suicide’. One of these deaths involved a shooting from the back & falling off a highrise hotel. For some reason is called Suicide. Real suspicious, as of now 48 bankers have died/ ‘Suicided’ themselves. Just google ‘Banker Death Count’ & all these articles come out, this shit ain’t no coincidence anymore & it‘s no conspiracy anymore. At first I thought it was a coincidence, once that number reached the 10’s, it stopped being one. This like ‘Watchmen’, but with bankers instead of superheroes. All in all we’re blaming the blonde dude with the Egyptian attire & a weird hybrid leopard thing. Anyhow, this has been happening for a year or so & this seems like it’s the beginning of something. I’m not meaning to sound like the slimy conspiracy theorist, but these killings may reach the thousands & we may need to know the reasoning before then.
-The Oscars: A film awards version of the Special Olympics.
We’re going to do something new here on Blogababble in order to reach a more ‘mainstream’ audience. We’re going to do the unthinkable, CRITIQUE WHAT PEOPLE WORE!!!! Yup, we’re going to do what a shit ton of national & local ‘news’ sources have been doing since Sunday, commenting on what people wore instead of critiquing about real issues. Now, this is what you missed at that awards show.
These three ladies are wearing dresses.
This lady also wears a dress, but she looks like a bitch.
A ginger in a dress, that’s new. She has red hair….I bet she has no soul. -_- I’m kidding everybody, don’t send hate male. Or please do, I haven’t gotten anything on our ‘Blacktime’ email & it’s starting to worry me.
A lady in a dress who isn’t smiling. Why doesn’t this one smile? Too good to smile huh? Why I ought to non-violently smack your face, like Urrkel!……SMILE PLEASE!!!! L
Uh oh, EGO ALERT EGO ALERT EGO ALERT!!! Her ego levels are off the roof, better put her down & dispose of the body in a chamber where we can harvest her ego & use it as an energy source. If only. But honestly, Jennifer Lopez needs to slap that dick out of her mouth & shut up. I’m sick of her face. Oh, did I mention she has a dress on?
I did no editing on this picture, I shit you not. I did nothing to this picture, why did they censor her face? Is it because she’s ugly………probably. So here’s an ugly lady in a dress
Hey look, here’s something refreshing, another lady in a dress. This is getting monotonous, let’s switch genders here & see what the Male Cunts are wearing.
Hey look, a guy in a suit. At least it’s not a dress.
Oh look, two men in a suit. Gasp! I think this is one of those ‘Gay Couples’ that I heard about on the news & on shows targeted to millenials. Oh my, & they attended the Awards Ceremony, I’m sooooooo proud. They burned down bridges, but they opened up new roads. God bless those gays!
More guys in a suit, but they’re singing, but I doubt they’re a gay couple. Didn’t you hear? Gays can’t sing, I read about it in ‘Popular Mechanics’.
Oh my god, it’s Chevy Chase in a suit. Chevy Chase looks scarier now. I’m scared.
But in all seriousness I want to pour opinions about the Oscars.
Birdman, Directed by Alejandro González Iñárritu won best picture & all the latino based talk shows are going gaga over it. I haven’t seen Birdman so I can’t critique it, but I do notice some bullshit here. Mexicans have been directing movies & sending them in to the Academy. We got ‘Amores Perros’, which is like Mexican Pulp Fiction, was nominated in the early 2000’s, didn’t win awards. Y Tu Mama Tambien (directed by the same guy who did ‘Gravity’) was nominated but didn’t win. A few years back there was a film about a boy & his landscaper father who learn a lot while looking for their truck in L.A (I forgot the name but it had an all latino cast) was nominated, but didn’t win. Birdman wins, I see a clear as day pattern. It‘s both ‘racism‘ & the inner bullshit politics of the Academy. Most of the movies that I mentioned that were nominated & didn’t win have no big Hollywood names in their casting, but films that won like ‘Gravity, Children of Men & Birdman’ have A-list actors & actresses. Why is it that a Latino has to make a film with an all American A-list cast to be noticed. “Oh who cares about these no name actors, oh look, Jennifer Lawrence is in a movie, Let’s vote on that!” It’s corruption & racism. All the more reason why most of these films are all hype & no substance. I refuse to pay to see ’American Sniper’, unless someone sells me a bootleg, but only then I can have tranquility knowing my cash is not going towards a lie & it’s probably going to go to a kids’ college fund. “Where did you get the money for my tuition?” asked the scruffy little boy. “Jebus gave me the money when he bought a copy of ’American Sniper’. replies the father with a smile. Yeah…. Fuck Hollywood & I might watch some of the other Oscar nominated movies & I will continue to not support the academy & their degradation of the cinematic arts. All in all, Fuck the Oscars, fuck racism, Vive La Cinema!! Pretension is not interesting. Only when someone makes a movie that they want, not what they are asked to want, is when you get beautiful movies that are worth watching over & over again. I’ve gotten a ton of arguments against the facts, but David Lynch should make one last film. Just one, one I can actually see theatrically.
This week I have no topic, but do have a theme which I appropriately called “Blame the White Haired Kid”. This segment will be nothing but kinda like a ‘This Grinds my gears’ column extended into a ton of mini articles. So this will be a ranty blog, I’ll start with the serious ones first then I’ll get to the funny ones.
You know what pisses me off? Secret Racists, they piss me off. They sit in their fucking chapel, acting unracist until they let one out & someone calls them racist, & these jack offs deny it! Bitch, you are racist!! “No I’m not (Most commonly used response) I have black friends.” I’m not talking about race jokes or anything like that, I’m talking about people saying some of thee most racist shit that would make Nazis say “Dude, you went overboard.” They hide in their little tool sheds & do racist shit & then go to work hiding their racism. I at least give racists one tiny iota of respect for not hiding it, but secret racists are pieces of shit. Don’t get me wrong, all racists are assholes, but secret racists are on a whole other level of stupidity! Secret racists are always republicans in power, you know they’re racist but they deny it so they can win those ethnic votes, then do racist shit when they get all those votes.
You know what pisses me off? Annoying Tumblr Activists. Noted, not all activists on Tumblr are annoying, but it seems like the ones I get on my feed are the ‘If you do not like one specific thing about our cause, you’re against it! YOU SIR ARE AN EVIL MAN!!!’ In general, these people that pressure people to be on any side piss me off. That’s why I vote ‘Independent’ because I’m sick of the bullshit bickering over Republicans & Democrats, they’re both the same shit, except one bathes in money & the other bathes in gluten-free hippie water that is actually money. So these Annoying Tumblr Activists are fighting for good causes, but the way they fight for them is retarded, they‘re like ‘PeTA‘ with their hypocracies. The elephant in the room, Feminism! I’m not against feminism but there are too many idot ‘feminists’ out there that tainted the cause with their stupidity. These are the ones that shout “Don’t opress me!!” when nothing is done to them & pick small issues to wrap them in their lies just for attention. I thought Tumblr was meant to be about love & pictures of cats & showing older generations that we aren‘t as stupid as they think. Guess I was wrong. Don’t get my words tied up, It’s not just Feminism, we got that stupid ‘Meninism’ bullshit that could have worked as a movement to abolish the stereotype of men labeled ‘Macho’ & bring awareness to Male Rape. Yes ladies & gentlemen, men can get raped either by women who damage their genetalia or by another man! Meninism, despite being a dumb sounding word could have been about something to abolish the fucking stereotype. It became nothing of the sort & failed since it was formed by neck beards who cry like bitches because their B.O kept them from scoring with the ladies. It became a bitchfit from castrated males who think “Wooman gon tek mah rights away!” You gotta be weak as hell if you think a group of people of the certain gender are going to take your rights away. (I know, we already talked about race, bear with me) Some of these activists can’t stand that other people are different than others & there‘s more than one race in this country/ planet that are dealing with racism. You fail as an ‘Anti-race’ activist group when you ignore reason. Listening to reason is the key to fighting for a cause. Martin Luther King JR had reason to march, he didn’t just shout shit for no reason, yet that seems to be the thing these idiot activist pages do. Oh & there’s another thing that annoying tumblr race activists do that pisses me off, the whole ‘Don’t defend whitey, they’re all racist & evil’ bullshit that led me to unfollow some of these assholes. I am an open minded person so I like to see two sides of the issue before casting an opinion, but these guys are more one sided than a bootlegged pokemon card that preach about not being stereotyped, yet stereotype the other. Yeah, EQUALITY FOR ALL (Except whitey). I’ve said this countless of times, EVERYONE CAN BE A RACIST!! I live with Mexican racists, I’ve seen Asian racists that are highly against interracial dating, there was an African American guy in my ceramics class who was racist (He‘s long gone)!!! ANYONE CAN BE RACIST, YOU ASSHOLES!! White, black, brown, yellow, doesn’t matter; everyone seems to want to be superior than the other. All in all these annoying Tumblr Activists need to take that stick off their ass, calm the fuck down & be educated instead of shouting shit they think is activism. Tumblr activism is nothing but a shameless pissing contest. I know there are more issues that have been tainted by idiot online activists so I’ll pretty much say the same to those I didn’t mention.
(Plug Plug: We’re annoying activist free. Sure we reblog some serious issues on our Tumblr blog, but the whole thing is nothing but fun. A miasma of tonally uneven stuff. One second there will be a very sensual picture of Betty Page or a funny Pokemon picture, the next would be a picture of a dead hippy. FUN FOR THE ENTIRE FAMILY! http://www.blcktime-epress.tumblr.com)
You know what pisses me off? Alcoholics, they piss me off. Alcoholics & drunks are in that category of annoying people along with bicyclists & dudes with massive pubes on their chins. Drunks are assholes, they ruin sober people’s enjoyment with their presence, they think they’re smart & strong & they stank. When they’re sad they tell you about their problems which is annoying & when they’re not drunk sad, they’re stupid happy & then turn stupid angry, just like bipolar people, except not as clinical. DRUNKS PISS ME OFF! They run around thinking they’re smart, step into a car & drive because they think they’re smart & end up killing themselves or someone else. That grinds my gears, drunk drivers, they think they’re all that when they’re in court crying to the judge “I’m sorry I have drove drunk, boo hoo. I need help, send me to rehab with the polo horses & the rich people massages. Boo hoo hoo.” I’m pretty much preaching to the choir when I say drunks need a kick to the face & a boot shoved up the ass. It’s the ethical way.
You know what pisses me off? I’m pretty much speaking to the minority majority here, when people see you for your race & start speaking in the language they think you understand. One time some woman came up to me, I know English but she thought “This must be one of them ‘Mexicans I heard about on Fox News. I will try to communicate with this alien being. Olah! Meay Lammo Martha. Cuayday galar la cheesey maranero!” I do understand that most of people from my ethnicity don’t speak English, but I’d respect you a little more if you asked first before insulting my intelligence! To everyone everywhere, ask before you make an idiot of yourself; I’ll respect you more for asking if I speak whatever language instead of making me feel retarded. I know very little French & my Spanish is pretty much dying so I cannot compete with someone from the motherland. So that’s the moral here, ask before I let you make an ass of yourself & speak ‘Klingon’ in spite of that horrid insinuation of “You don’t speak English, you’re a darkie. Darkies don‘t speak Spanish you fucking beaner!” It’s not cool man.
You know what PISSED me off? I don’t know if this still happens (maybe some of you readers can email me. plug plug: firstname.lastname@example.org) but when I was in middle school there were a huge string of fights that took place during lunchtime or after school. The principal was ‘Concerned’ about this, so in order to combat these fights there was a ‘Zero Tolerance’ rule that was put in effect for fights or any kind of fighting. Why these guys fought? I never understood why, repressed homosexuality? I have no clue, these guys would fight then walk away, fight again the next day then walk away. What pissed me off was the fact that these clowns running the school would go to deep lengths to not only to suspend the kids fighting, but the kids who were around the fights. Some poor sap would walk by a fight, then wrong timing would lead to this bystander to get suspended, just for being near there. You know who you are, ALEXANDER FLEMING MIDDLE SCHOOL, I HOPE THAT SCHOOL GETS HIT BY A TORNADO OR SHARTED ON BY A CYCLOPS!!!! There’s plenty more bullshit that school has done in the three years I’ve been there, but that’s another story. Zero Tolerance rules are shit, they don’t prevent or stop things, rather they drive them underground like Prohibition.
You know what pisses me off? People who created & use the word ‘Selfie’ or create these new words for shit that already have words & ‘modernize‘ them like pretentious bastards. These fuckers think they’ve created something ‘new’ & ‘innovative’. No, they just got something that has been done by many & put a new bullshit label on it. Before the term ‘Selfie’ hit the mainstream, it was called a fucking ‘Self-Portrait‘ or a simpler term would be just a ‘picture‘. “Oh look, Colin Powell uploaded his picture when he was a young man where he photographed himself in front of a mirror, HE INVENTED THE SELFIE!” No he didn’t you tween fuckers with your ugg boots & fat yoga pants!!!! I HATE ALLOH YOU!!!! ‘Sigh’, I’m sounding like the old man on the porch, aren’t I?
I think that does it, I do not want to run over my required ‘four page mark’ so here are the links (Again). I might do this again next time, depending if I draw a blank on what to write about. So watch out for PART: II next time.
All of you have a good one & Read, like or comment.