I know I’m out of high school but danmit, I cannot leave this crime unjust. I am unsure if every school has a literary magazine but the magazine I’m going to talk about is a stupid magazine named called ‘SCRAWL’ (Everyone from Narbonne will find that name familiar.) and every year they accept submissions which range from pictures, drawings, poetry, short stories, etc. Well, senior year I decided I should send something to show people I’m not just another face and I am capable of transporting others into worlds beyond the imagination. The flyers advertised “All submissions will be published. If not, we will provide you with a response why.” I decided to write a PG, youth oriented tale of a young boy escaping the clutches of their conservative and puritan parents to search for his long lost rebellious older sister. I typed and edited so much, I felt like someone with OCD while trying to find any little mistake that I could find and sent my clean manuscript to the mailbox in their offices. I also added my Email address, my homeroom number, my phone number and of course my real name than my pseudonym just so the editor(s) can notify me if I have any problems with the manuscript or to tell me any constructive criticism. I waited till the end of the month after the deadline and saw the stacks of SCRAWL magazines in the front teacher’s desk. I was cheery and jeery and could not wait to see my story in print with my real name in print (Whoever writes, oh boy, seeing that name in print in a certain font where everyone can see it feels sooo good). My story was nowhere to be seen but I was not mad yet. I admit, I had my hopes up saying things like “I am going to blow minds man! I will take these people beyond the imagination and show them I am capable than just being another face. I am a CREATOR! The teachers will be like ’That’s jebus? He’s bloody brilliant!’ Along with ‘Dude, this guy made my heart strings cry, he deserves some O.G respect.’ So I expected a lot and I admit it. I waited for my constructive criticism but it never came. I felt sad, I was so messed up I even insulted these gang banger kids by saying “Hey ladies, nice panty hose” since they wore long white socks. I didn’t care if they shot me, I was pissed at the world, then stopped and just became pissed at those people at SCRAWL so I called them on the phone and asked what happened to my manuscript. No freaking response, they hung up on me thinking “If we hang up, he’ll forget.” I don’t know my own IQ, but I’m not stupid. I may look it with my hand drawn sandman shirt but I am smarter than these albino hipster Aryan fucks think. Like I said, I received no letter, no call, not even a visit from a representative telling me about the original material I’ve written. I would’ve understood if they told me it was too long or I wrote it badly, I love constructive criticism because I can improve from it, I got nothing. I visited their crap ass classroom full of these idiot kids who look like the type who think they can speak Japanese but just end every English word with ‘ARU’ in it like ‘Pencil-aru!’ Real stupid stuff and these people ignored my presence until I talked to this guy, but all I got from a response was “I would tell my editor but she ain’t here.” Next I called them again but under another pseudonym and posed as a concerned parent/ lawyer (I tried to keep a straight face, I swear) and talked in a deep Buffalo Bill voice. I asked “What have you done to my son’s nice story? You know I can Sue you for being a plagiarist and false advertising.” This is funny, the response this boy had sounded like this “Uhh.. Can you give me a sec? ….(Background) It’s the boy’s teacher, he sounds serious, I’m scared.” then they hang up again. It was not until later I found out this is not a plagarism scheme because they did not publish it under a different name which would have caused me to go into a psychopathic state and I would’ve known who stole my idea and grabbed his or her hand and drag her to the middle of the street so a car hits us.
Anyways, this whole writing dream is not just a phase, that’s what people whom I told thought ‘This is just a phase like when he wanted to be superman or that film directing phase.’ OH HO HO NO! This is no phase, this is a goal of mine I wish to fulfill and entertain both casual and hardcore readers alike. I will not stop my dream until I die and I’m not letting some asshole hipster rejects stifle my creativity with their pointy fingers and their overly huge pancake nipples. I used my personal demons at the time to help me choke the truth out of these bloodsucking bastards!!! I write with the Iron Fist and express ideas with a burning desire and burning soul!!!! They thought by ignoring me I would stay quiet in a snap like magic dust. NO NO NAI!!! I am a vicious wolf that’s been disfigured by ignorance, hate and Judgment, my roar cries stronger and louder when injustice happens to me. It yells of a crazy creature with an ambient sound and it’s freaking scarier than all hell. The truth and my anger are drugs against their stupid war which would have never started if they just gave me a letter or at least told me why my story was not published. You cannot kill the truth, it breathes and hungers for cowards like SCRAWL. My demons told me “keep up the work, they are pissing and pooping their pants. Hone you’re creative property young gun.” and that’s advice I can work defending myself from bastards like the SCRAWL staff. I SAY TO HELL WITH INJUSTICE, TO HELL WITH THESE EXONERATED BASTARDS, TO HELL WITH THE LIES, TO HELL WITH PLAGARISM, TO HELL WITH ANTI-CREATIVITY, TO HELL WITH PREJUDICE, TO HELL WITH ART SNOBBERY, TO HELL WITH UPTIGHT BRIDGE PLAYERS, TO HELL WITH CHARLATANS, and finally (I tried to find that SCRAWL magazine to curse these staff people one by one but could not find it, I’m sorry) TO FUCKING FIREY DIAHREAH DEATH WITH THE PEOPLE AT SCRAWL AND THESE PEOPLE WHO SLAUGHTER INNOCENT IDEAS AND RAPE CREATIVITY!!!!!!!!!
Their magazine is full of stupid, teen angst that would make Robert Smith puke in annoyance. Here’s a little excerpt “MY MOM MADE SPAGETTI!!! DARK DARK DARK!! I’M FAT!!! MY MOM IS A SLUT!!!! DARK DARK DARK!!! I CUT MY VEINS INSTEAD OF KICK THE BULLIES ASS BECAUSE I’M WEAK AND I’M STUPID AND HAVE PANCAKE NIPPLES. DARK DARK DARK.”
I know what you’re thinking, I wish I had the angry spirit and guts like this guy here in the interwebs. You do, you have that iron first and you can stand up for yourself or that cause you want to bring awareness. I want all of you to raise your arm ,who cares if you are indoors or outdoors, act like you’re holding a specialty weapon and yell your vicious battle cry. We are all strong, we all have the iron fist, we hunger for cowards.
To all the people at SCRAWL, SHAME!!! Just……SHAME ON YOU, YOU PATHETIC FUCKS.
If you are still at Narbonne, share this post with fellow students and if you see a stack of SCRAWL booklets in your class, do not even touch those booklets. They do not deserve the readership, do not subscribe to their sensationalistic, angst, communist crap. KICK THEM IN THE READERSHIP! Also do not submit to their crap ass publication, do not give them money when they sell stuff. Drag them down to hell and make them choke on their own sins.
If you want to share this even though it’s not relevant to you but want to share, do as you wish.
My last words for today to all are ‘Growl to show strenght, Bark to intimidate.’
Still, to this day I have not gotten a reason why my story was not published, but I will not give up. I have scars, not wounds so have at me SCRAWL punks.
PS: If you know anyone if the staffm don’t harm them. I do not want to be held responsible for injuries or death of certain people. Just tell them they suck ass or they should quit and share this story to them.