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The fourth of July is already here & I’m assuming the only people excited for this are the children, family people who actually go out & the drunks. Now I’m not going to sit here, sounding like some PC jack off telling you why celebrating the 4th is immoral. I’m not going to cramp anyone’s fun, but good god, what is it with people lighting up fireworks every second of the day? Since May there was always some asshat in the neighborhood lighting up one of those cheap bootleg fireworks with the huge pipe. You know the one’s I’m talking about, those Chinese one’s that shoot up into the sky & implode up there. Also, what kinda fucking moron lights those up in the daytime? What kind of enjoyment do people get lighting up night time fireworks in the day? It’s stupid & in the hood it’s fucking dangerous. Not because people in the ghetto are fucking idiots, but because urine drinking thugs use that as their fucking cover to shoot someone & get away with. Was it a gun shot or a firework? I don’t know, we’ll wait the following morning to see if the local news comes by in their van to record a report on a dead baby.
Last year, near where I live, some guy was shot & the real kicker was he was a father & if it weren’t for these fuckers lighting up every second, everyone in that vicinity would have reacted quicker, got him to the first ambulance ride to the hospital & he would have still had a fighting chance. That’s the shit that pisses me off, sometimes gunshots sound like firecrackers; hell, recently there was a shootout here where I live & no one noticed. Sounded too slow to be firecrackers, but too fast to be fireworks. There’s a difference, folks.
Now I’m not saying we should ban all the fireworks like a fucking PC parent feeding their kids water with saltines & making them watch an episode of ‘Whaddayado,’ but seriously, hold onto those goddamn fireworks until the 4th of July. Seriously, do some people have such a tiny ass penis that they feel the need to pop one of those huge ass fireworks every single second? Compensation for their shortcomings. You know what, I do believe they have a tiny ass dick, a dick so tiny that even Asians feel better about themselves compared to these fucking asshats lighting up fireworks every single second. I feel bad for their wives & husbands. Yes, I’m insinuating that some of them are gay. Just hold onto those fireworks, then when darkness comes, light them up. Whether they burn you or not, that’s all up to Darwinism.
Also, take your pets indoors. Seriously, the last thing I want to hear (let alone see) is dogs dying because some asshat fucking inbred country anuses left them outside because “Dawgs got no sowls.” Take your pets in, it may sound like a bombing to us, but it sounds pretty fucking apocalyptic to them. Also, respect the Veterans in the neighborhood. I’m not leaving them behind, they too may suffer from PTSD which is shit none of us can comprehend. So if there’s a sign outside your neighbor’s door that says something like ‘Veteran lives here’, then goddamn follow the sign & light up those fireworks somewhere else.
Despite that, you all have a fucking great day today & I’m pretty surprised that PC people haven’t gotten up in arms about the 4th. I’m sure they’re out there, but after the destruction of Thanksgiving, the destruction of Halloween & the destruction of Christmas (Kinda), the 4th still remains the 4th, surprisingly. I don’t do the whole fireworks thing anymore, all it is is burning money. Literally, people spend money to burn something. I can do that for free!!!